ANOTHER RANDOM SCENE FOR Y’ALL! IT’S FROM A BUDDY NOVEL WITH ONE OF MY FRIENDS. IT’S ABOUT… I DON’T EVEN KNOW. SHE HAS A PLAN, BUT I DON’T? ANYWAY HERE’S A SCENE FROM THE VILLAIN. Also this is meant to be satirical, just fyi.
Shadow paced his lair, his prized wolf asleep on his bed. Why must it always come to murder? He wondered. Why can’t people just hand over a middle-school girl willingly?
Shadow knows why: it’s illegal for some weird reason.
Sigh. He just needed Emile- he needs to get her, put her under his spell, and force her to convince the rest of the school to join his army. From there, the legendary wolf pack will rise to power once again! Human and wolf as one, rising above these mortals and returning the world to greatness.
I will finish what you started, Grandfather.
Then he begins plan B.
Or, at least, he attempts to begin plan B. Caroline, his rose-haired sister, interrupts. “Shadowww, Mom said you were out here-”
“I’m plotting, Caroline.”
Affronted, Caroline steps back, disdain over her bronze features. “I’m your sister.”
“Now that we’ve got introductions out of the way…” Shadow motions her to have a seat. “Any ideas? I need an evil army of middle schoolers.”
“Ew, middle schoolers are so whiny and all of them are brats!” She whines brattily, like the middle schooler she is. “Why middle schoolers? Why not an, I don’t know, an actual army? Raid the airforce- those guys are cool.” After a second she says, “Why do you need an army at all?”
“My revenge?” Shadow offers. “Wolves like children better anyway. Middle schoolers are more… resilient than toddlers. Toddlers would be my first choice.”
“You are barbaric,” Caroline states, thrusting her head back and huffing. “All you wanna do is ‘fulfill your destiny’ and become a furry. A furry.”
“I’m not a furry, I just want unity between human and wolf. Like it once was.”
“You are so difficult,” Shadow grumbles. Caroline is narrow-minded and a bit… dull. She’ll never understand what it was like in the glory days. Switching between wolfkind and humans, taking on the evil humans and developing powers not of this world. “Anyway, the possession of those ambulance guys and policemen was a success. Unfortunately, I don’t have enough spell left. Would you assist me in making more?”
“Only if you get me gummy worms. Now.”
“Nuh-uh-uh! Gummy worms.”
“Fine.” Shadow rummages through his catskin bag and produces a ziploc of candy. “Here. Now help me.”
They begin to concoct an evil plan.
Caroline idly rifles through papers, singing to herself. “Somebody once told me, the world was gonna roll me, I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed…”
“Caroline…” Shadow warns.
“She was lookin kinda dumb-”
“-with her finger and her thumb-”
“-in the shape-
“-of an ‘L’-”
“ON HER FOREHEADDD!”
Shadow slams the table and bellows, “STOP!!!” His eyes flash yellow and he grimaces, baring his sharpened teeth.
“Furry, furry, furry, furry-furry! Wheeeeheheheheheeee.” Caroline giggles, holding up a print of a purple fox-suited people wearing bikinis over the thick fur suits. “You are so weird.”
“Those are my uniforms for my evil army, Caroline!” He snatches the magazine from her hands. “Are you going to be helpful or not? Cause I will take those gummy worms back.”
“What gummy worms?!” Caroline hurls the empty bag at Shadow and flounces away. Shadow huffs and sinks to the chair, rubbing his forehead in exasperation. It’s one thing to tease him about being a furry, but it’s another to eat all the gummy worms and not even help! Rude.
Huffing once more, (because one cannot huff enough in these situations) Shadow peers at his sister’s notes. “Well, well, well. It seems my idiot sister actually has a good idea. Surprising!” He holds up the paper for his wolf to read. She just glances at it with a blank look. “I think we’ve stumbled upon something great! Something marvelous! Something-” Shadow reads the last line and dies a little inside. “Something unoriginal.”
*and that was something I’m not sure yet but something widely known as awful*
His wolf just sniffs and rolls back to sleep.